2008: The Best Year Ever?

I guess it is about time for the obligatory "year in review" blog post.

I was talking to a friend last week who had the absolute craziest year ever... At the beginning of the year she had just quit her job and broken up with her boyfriend. She had no idea what she was going to do, but she knew something big was about to happen. She got a job assisting severely handicapped people. In Feb she met Ryan, they were engaged by June and Married by Nov. She traveled out of the country for the first time... to Sudan with me. She was reunited with her father, whom she had not spoken to in years and had immense bitterness towards. He was diagnosed with a brian tumor this summer. He died a few weeks ago. I can't imagine being in Jeni's shoes... looking back at this year realizing how everything changed, her family... who qualifies as her family... her job, life goals, vision. The town she lives in, the church she goes to, the people she hangs out with... everything is different.

Someone suggested to me over break that I have had a similar experience. I am still not convinced that I can compare my year to Jeni's... but it has had it's share of surprises. The real difference is (in usual form) MOST of my changes were planned.

I applied to American University at the end of last year. Jeni was the one who reminded me last week how unlikely it was that I would get in. I was pretty worried about it, I didn't know what I would do if grad school fell through, because it was what I unequivocally felt led to do. I mean, let's be honest... I am not the typical applicant. I was homeschooled. My transcript makes it look like I took 4 years to get my associates at a community college. What it doesn't say is that I started part-time in high-school. I got a strange degree form this small college no one has ever heard of. How could they know that the program was an excellerated degree program designed for people with extensive work experience? I was the the unusual student in those classes, the only one actually college-age. Never doubt God, because against all odds... He came through and I got in. I had the opportunity to talk to the person who decided to let me in earlier this semester. She was one of my professors, and she said that even though I was an unusual student, I had done well at whatever it was that I had done. And apparently, my recommendations were glowing (thanks guys!).

So, I got in... that meant I had to quit my good job, find a place to live and actually make a move to a city... where I didn't know a soul. Did I mention I had lived at home until last July, and even then I was 20 minutes from my parents house? In addition, I had never been in a 'normal' college classroom. I was always with non-traditional students. Now I was going to the biggest, and one of the best foreign relations schools in the world. Talk about shaking it up.

I am still surprised I stayed in NC as long as I did. I had always wanted to leave but God had never let it happen. By this point, I wasn't sure I wanted to leave anymore, but God was pushing me out.

The past four and a half months since I moved have been incredible. My friends back home were reminding me how nervous I was about meeting people. It has always been hard for me to put myself out there, make small talk, and get to know people. I knew I had to overcome so of those shortcomings to make this transition work.

I did everything I could to make the move smooth. I identified the church I wanted to attend before I moved so that I could jump right in. I still remember the first service I went to at Ebz right after my move. I was so awkward and nervous. But, I pushed through... went to every connection for new people I could. E-mailed about a small group and jumped right into it. I even decided to volunteer to help with the service production. But really, the difference was made by God working in me, shaping me and forcing me to grow into the person he needs to be. Apparently, that person needs to be more outgoing.

I find myself gravitating to people who are new to town. I really want to help them settle in and meet people, because I know how much it helped me.

So, anyway... back to the review. At the end of 2008, I find myself looking forward at a life I did not expect, with a community surrounding me I could have never even fathomed, filled with incredible peace and contentment that I have never experienced before.

I thought 2008 was about academics... but, looking back, I think God wanted to teach me about people and about relationships. I thought it was about exploration and adventure, but really I think it was about being content wherever you are. I thought it was about maturity, but honestly, I think God wanted me to chill out and not be afraid to act my age. This year was nothing like I expected it to be.

You MAY remember that instead of making New Years resolutions, my church back in NC encourages people to pick a word for the year. Something that describes how you want to grow in the next 12 months. The first year mine was compassion, and believe you me... it made a dramatic impact on my life. For someone who was born with very little, I have to fight off bleeding heart status sometimes. The next year it was Purpose. I wanted to some vision for my life, even if it was small. In needed to be passionate about something. God transformed my heart in 2007 and gave me incredible vision for my future. That is what led me to apply to grad school in the first place. In 2008 my word was trust. I didn't really know why I picked it until recently. Looking back, I have learned how to let go and trust God on so many levels this year. Jeni reminded me how I used to hold onto things. Yea, I still stress... but there is an underlying peace, that not only makes those hard times easier, but it gives me hope that God will continue to help me increase my trust in him. Maybe one way I won't be a worry wart... who knows. Either way, I had to trust God with everything this year and he has taken care of me. I am so thankful for his provision as I made all of these huge steps of faith this year.

Who knows what 2009 has in store... but I can't imagine how it could top 2008, and the thought that God could have something even better in store, blows my mind. I am praying about my word for this year. When I come up with it, I am sure I will let you know.